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Sometimes it's good to watch bad tv. You don't have to follow storylines, plot progression, or character development, and let's face it...Sometimes you just wanna watch someone get bitch slapped. America's Next Top Model is bad tv at it's best...or worst. Depending on the model's angle, and what Ms. J is wearing.

america's next.jpg

Here's a quick rundown of last night's episode. No one got bitch slapped, but someone did lose a thumb. Yowsa.

The central conflict revolved around African refugee/Iman doppleganger Fatima as she faced an international crisis. The models smelled a trip abroad in the air and Fatima hadn't updated her travel documents. Will she make it to the consulate in time? Will she miss a photo shoot in the process? Whatever is a model to do? All turned out well, but Tyra milked it more than she did in her got milk ad.

Now for the thumb. Arty redhead Lauren who has a bad walk and apparently tourettes syndrome, cut her thumb off while slicing an onion. Good thing there's not an IQ prerequisite to be cast on ANTM. You wouldn't last a day in Hell's Kitchen you donkey.

*Spoiler alert if you're saving it on tivo*

Adorable Stacy-Ann (reminiscent of Tootie from the Facts of Life ) had been flying under the radar, but got the boot for not being able to angle her big jaw properly. Sorry Stace. Personally, I think it should've been Dominique's time to go. For some reason she reminds me of the dude looks like a lady from the Crying Game.

Sorry. I guess bad tv just brings out the bitch in me.

*Keepin' my thumbs in tact,


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Samara Sanchez

About Sammy

Sammy Sanchez is a Miami based freelance writer, greeting card designer, and self-professed USWeeklyholic. Sammy loves tall coffee light frappuccinos, vino not from a box, and Mark Ruffalo...not necessarily in that order.
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