As much as I enjoy indulging in all of the fab festivities that come along with Fashion Week, I always seem to fall victim to a series of unfortunate events.

-Last summer I broke my favorite digital cam while trying to secure a backstage interview.

-This swim season, I lost my beloved Marc Jacobs sunglasses.

My adored aviators were last seen right before I washed my hands in the poolside bathroom at the Raleigh hotel. One minute they were on the counter, the next minute they were gone.

I suspect foul fashion play.

They are probably long gone, now shielding sunlight and harmful UV rays from the eyes of some tacky spray tanned chick casing the joint who swiped them on the sly along with a number of front row goodie bags, but if you have any knowledge concerning their whereabouts, please contact me directly with subject line Lets Talk Shades. All tips may remain anonymous with no questions asked.

I do not have the funds to offer a reward, if I did I would spend it on a new pair of Marc Jacobs sunglasses, but I will exchange any helpful information for 3 consecutive and invaluable Ask Sammy tips, gratis.

We all have fashion fetishes that may or may not make sense to the general public. Socks with mandals (men's sandals), oversized shoulder pads, suspenders, skinny ties... paisley.

My thing? I have a moustache fetish. The new man in my life doesn't understand this and keeps asking me if I'd like him to grow one. I say no. I am only drawn to staches that are not originally attached to the face, you see. Moustaches not fashioned from facial hair. For instance, my favorite unhairy handlebar hardware is a moustache shaped keychain that doubles as a mirror that I scored for pennies in the clearance section at Urban Outfitters. I adore it because it tickles me every time I lock or unlock a door and I always have a last minute disguise on hand in case I run into the Feds.

Clearly I am not the only one who takes a shine to staches, I found a whole crop of upper lip loot from this Beards are Sexy Tote Bag from Etsy to a Haute Handlebar Ring and Bark Reynolds Fetch Toy for the clean shaven pooch who needs to go incognito, both from Modcloth.

But my all-time favorite has to be the Toddland Moustache Wallet from Urban, because everyone needs a little stache to carry their cash.

*Added bonus for underaged boys - The vinyl adhesive moustache adds years to your license photo, ideal for when you get carded buying beer.

If you're over the all-day marathon reruns of ANTM on Bravo, I'm proud to report that the 15th Cycle of America's Next Top Model premieres tonight with legendary fashion icon Diane Von Furstenberg in tow joining Tyra Banks, Vogue's Andre Leon Talley and Nigel Barker on the panel of esteemed fashion evaluators.

So if you wanna be on top, tune in to the CW at 8. If you wanna be on top but have zero interest in watching this show, right on.

Today marks the first day of Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week in New York for the Spring 2011 collections. I am here in Florida. What is wrong with this picture?

If you're stuck in the southernmost state like me, you can now rejoice for fashionable Floridians can celebrate all of the glitz and glamour of New York Fashion Week right in their own backyard with Fashion's Night Out at Aventura Mall.

Fashion's Night Out [fash-uhns nahyt out]
noun -

1. A Global Celebration of Fashion
2. A Shopping extravaganza that spans the globe involving 100 cities, from LA to Paris, Brooklyn to Bombay.
3. New Year's/Rosh Hashanah for chicks who like to play their charge cards right.

If you don't have anything to do tomorrow night, get out of the closet and get thee to Aventura mall where you can sip, socialize, shop and score amazing deals from elite brands including Michael Kors, True Religion, 7 for all Mankind, William Rast, Henri Bendel, Hugo Boss, Diesel, Betsy Johnson, BCBG Max Azria and an entire mall full of other fashion week worthy stores.

Plus, enjoy a special Fashion show featuring Justin Timberlake's William Rast label and J. Lindeberg in center court at 7pm.

*Hip Tip - After shopping the night away, hit up the Concierge Center for an exclusive Aventura Mall shopping bag stocked with a $10 Aventura Mall gift card, certificates for free valet parking and a complimentary glass of champagne at The Grill on the Alley, Grand Lux Cafe or Ocean Prime (limited to the first 300 customers who present $100 or more in same-day receipts).

Consider yourself outed.

I've gotten over the fact that I'm not physically on the scene for the debut of MB Fashion Week at the new Lincoln Center venue. Really, I am.

I found sweet solace by watching a live stream of the Christian Siriano show with my computer hooked up to my HD flatscreen while sitting in the center of a row of strategically placed folding chairs in my loft. My chair had my name on it. I felt important. A cardboard cutout of Gwyneth Paltrow sat next to me. I complimented her shoes. I applauded like crazy when the last look left the runway. I grabbed my self-assembled goodie bag filled with mini hotel toiletries/perfume samples and headed downstairs to serve myself a post-show cocktail. It was like I was there.

Then I took my dog out to poop.

Okay, so this re-enactment may present itself as ridiculous and pathetic, but I must admit that I felt a rush watching the show live and taking in the looks at the same moment as all of the fashion movers and shakers that actually made it to Lincoln Center.

As for the collection, Christian has settled in to showing at Fashion Week with grace and confidence featuring a number of classic white separates, subdued nudes, mesmerizing metallics, a short snakeskin suit combo that was both venomous and vivacious and of course, a showstopping red evening gown that looked like the aftermath of a gang fight with a bevy of Bozo the clowns.

*Side Note - I am available to recreate Fashion Week shows in your living room, for a nominal fee.

It seems like it was only yesterday when Kanye West made cyber headlines for busting in on Taylor Swift's VMA acceptance speech, but an entire year has passed and there are so many new egomaniacs to make fun of.

I will begin on a positive note with my best dressed pics for the evening.

Nickelodeon nymph Selena Gomez classed up the joint in a grown up silver Reem Acra gown with a divine bustier inspired bodice, Emma Stone scored an Easy A at the VMA's in a black leather Pucci perfectly paired with a purple mini clutch and Twilight's Ashley Greene vamped it up like the bad girl at prom with a naughty and nice strapless white Giambattista Valli dress with black lace detail.

As for the worst dressed, Lady Gaga assumed the position once again accepting her Moonman in a very unladylike gown fashioned from bacon. Although she swept the awards for her single "Bad Romance", she was butchered for her "Bad Happenstance" on the red carpet that created a bloody stir.

Okay Lady, I get it, you like to shock, but if you're going to wear a dress made out of meat, at least accessorize accordingly with a bone in your hair.

PETA had a beef with Lady Gaga's red carpet concoction. Gaga's response? "Eat me."

I'm all about consolidating...

Credit, student loans, music in my iTunes library. You name it, if I can consolidate it into a great big nice and neat pile, I will gladly do so, which is why I am all in favor of the NARS Beautiful Life Lip and Cheek Palette featured at NARS Cosmetics.

Instead of toting around a cluster of compacts, I can now consolidate all of my make up must haves into one cute little compartment that fits four signature shades of lipstick in Sexual Healing, Honolulu Honey, Roman Holiday and Funny Face, plus a duo of flirty cheek colors in Copacabana and Orgasm that make any touch up a climactic event.

Take advantage of this All-in-One face saver that is a gift for the complexion and for your smallest clutch, housed in a tiny vessel that is packaged in a chic limited-edition zippered, nylon case for $55. Plus, score a complimentary 1 oz Body Glow and free shipping on orders of $50 or more with code CATGLOW.

If NARS is good enough for Kristen Bell of Veronica Mars, it's good enough for me.

To sum things up, good make up is from NARS, good tennis players are named Venus.

This weekend I finally had the chance to take in An Education.

Before you applaud me for furthering my studies, allow me to clarify. I did not audit an English Lit or pottery themed night class at my local high school. Instead, I rented the Nick Hornby penned adaptation of the real-life coming of age story of British columnist, Lynn Barber.

Here's a quick plot summation:

Brilliant sixties school girl meets charming older man in the form of Peter Sarsgaard.
Charming man seduces young girl by showering her with fine art, music, food and travels.
School girl discovers that life is not always a picnic in Paris.

Carey Mulligan is effervescent as Jenny Mellor, a 16 year old London schoolgirl who desperately longs for a life outside of the classroom in lieu of her father's dreams of her securing a formal education at Oxford. Mulligan's Academy Award and Golden Globe nominations were well-deserved as she convincingly escorts us on a journey of self discovery where she evolves before our eyes from a bicycle riding, cello playing, cigarette puff sneaking adolescent into a worldly, sophisticated and cultured gamine.

From ladylike coats to kitten heels, vintage handbags to elegant printed sheaths and fancy chignons, Carey/Jenny scores the highest marks when it comes to sixties style, with a wardrobe that would leave both Audrey Hepburn and Jackie O. breathless.

School for thought - If you don't have time to scour the thift stores, score your own vintage fashion findings from Modcloth, Santoki Vintage and Ramona West à la Etsy.

I was disappointed to hear that It's Off With Alexa Chung. My favorite Brit It Girl might have had her MTV talk show axed, but she has been keeping herself busy nevertheless with a blossoming partnership with J. Crew’s Madewell denim line, featuring her own collection of fab fashions for fall.

The Alexa Chung for Madewell collection is comprised of basic bits and pieces with an edge, reminiscent of everything that we love about Lexi, with dresses, outerwear and separates that elicit a sexy tomboy meets sixties girl band vibe.

I'm craving the cuter than cute coveralls and tea party dresses, high-waisted jeans, oversized wool jackets, short shorts and more spectacular pieces that are signature Chung.

All's Well that's Madewell for Alexa.

I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

I believe in perfect imperfections.

A splatter of freckles across the nose, a perfectly planted birthmark, a glamorous gap toothed grin.

Once upon a time in a decade far far away, the fashion industry took a chance on one lone gap toothed girl named Lauren Hutton, whose face might not have launched a thousand ships, but it was the first smile to launch a major cosmetics deal with Revlon. And she fought tooth and nail to get it.

Today, gap toothed gals are finding their way on the runway and smiling at us from the pages of various fashion mags in ad campaigns for Chanel, Miu Miu, Marc Jacobs and Hudson jeans. Chelsey, one of America's Next Top Model's newest contestants even had her gap widened as part of her fierce model makeover.

From iconic Dutch model Lara Stone to Madonna and True Blood star Anna Paquin, it seems that a gap tooth grin is the new prerequisite in order to seal your fate as an “it” girl both on and off the runway. One of the most notable gap tooth “it” girls of the moment is my favorite Sydney born swimwear stunner – model Jess Hart.

Notorious for the smile that has quickly become an international sensation, Jess Hart is enjoying fame as a new face for Victoria’s Secret, a recognized Sports Illustrated swimsuit model and as the face of Seafolly 2011.

Jess, alongside up-and-coming supermodel Samantha Harris, Australia’s first aboriginal supermodel, both shine as the faces of Seafolly’s 2011 gorgeous new beachwear collection featuring flirty floral prints, retro polka dotted and ruffled numbers, bold and bright colors as well as basic black one-pieces and separates.

Check out this behind the scenes video of Jess and Samantha shooting their campaign on the beaches of Tropical North Queensland in Australia.

I'm sure it'll make you crack a smile.

After Sunday night's NFL showdown between the Dolphins and the Jets, I came to the conclusion that I was not orange crushing on the Dolphins' jerseys. Their brights were beyond distracting and reminded me of my 5th grade safety patrol belt (I was a lieutenant).

As a fashion blogger, I was reminded by another fashionable football fan that I have the responsibility to let my opinion be known. Therefore, I am going on the record here to point out that the Dolphins should refrain from wearing orange jerseys prime time, at home games or like, ever. In my fantasy football world, I would much prefer it if the Dolphins wore the traditional white and aqua uniforms that I grew up admiring.

Orange jerseys aside, I am on a quest to find cute Dolphins gear to wear to the Ale House during game days, so I hit my favorite online sports stop for team apparel, Fans Edge. I quickly bypassed the orange jerseys and found a series of tanks and tees that were just my style, modeled on a pretty chick who bore a striking resemblance to Alyssa Milano of Who's the Boss?.

It took me a minute before I realized, Oh ay, ay oh, that is Alyssa Milano! With a little research I discovered that Alyssa has partnered with the biggest names in sports like MLB, NFL, NBA, NHL, and NCAA with her own line of sports team apparel featuring tops, jeans and outerwear that are a step above and a far better fit than your boyfriend's ratty, beer-stained jersey.

I'm a fan of the Upper Deck Dolphins Sweater and the Layered Dolphins Tee for chillier game days and the Dolphins Burnout Tee for warmer days.

The higher ups will probably ignore my request to ban the orange jerseys, or they very well may comply. If the former is the case, orange you glad I wrote this blog?

In the past five years, I have bought more than my fair share of onesies. The majority of them are small and sassy, reveal a lot of leg, have ample room in the rear to accommodate mega junk in the trunk (i.e. super absorbent diapers) and three convenient snaps in the crotch for easy changing.

Well folks, the fashion times they are a-changing. Feast your eyes on these big girl onesies from Asos. The Levi's Double Denim Onesie is a jean/shirt hybrid that features an oversized light wash shirt attached to straight cut zip fly jeans for $193.78.

Cool idea and honestly, they don't even look like the two pieces are attached. It also manages to put an end to unfortunate coin slot reveals while saving precious time, shaving off a good 15 minutes to half hour every morning normally reserved for trying to pick out what-top-to-wear-with-what-jeans.

My main problem with this look? Unlike your baby's onesies, these aren't peepee and poopie friendly.

If you're up for the adult onesie challenge, do yourself a favor and go the the bathroom first...

...and don't have Mexican for lunch.