The perfect pear shape - How to dress your pear parts to perfection

Dear Caprilee,

I owe you one,
Missy

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Listen here Missy,

First off, Happy New Year. I am pleased that you came to me and will be proud to partake in your fashion transformation. Please send me before and after photos so I can add them to my portfolio in case I finally gather the courage to apply for a position with E's Fashion Police. Back to your resolution...

Finding stuff that complements your pear shape.

I'm going to take a cue from my friend Demetri Martin and insist that you refrain from wearing pear colored clothing. Also, whatever you do, don't act juicy.

Seriously, when shopping for a pear sized shape, A-line skirts and dresses are a pear's best friend. This A-Line dress from Metrostyle for instance, is a flattering choice for almost any and every body shape. Empire waists also rock a pear shaped body by minimizing hips and showing off a tiny waist. For tops - blouses that touch the middle of the hipline are best. Avoid super tight and cropped tops, they're not doing much for you. I promise.

When it comes to jeans and pants to dress your lower half- here's the bottom line. No high waisted trousers, no tapered legs, no light washes. Boot cut jeans and flared legs are just what you need to balance out your proportions. Stretch jeans are also a godsend for pear shapes. They hug your curves, move with you and don't make you feel like you're stuck in a can of sardines. Stay away from the skinny jeans and flat shoes. Heels make pears look slimmer, so try to stick to shoes that have at the very least a two inch heel.

Hope these tips help you achieve fashion success in 2009 Missy.

One more thing - Embrace your pear shape. J.Lo, Beyonce and Charlotte from Sex and the City are all pear shapes, and proud of it.

Be fruitful and prosper!

*Caprilee

Having a fashion dilemma or crisis?

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To heel, or not to heel - Proper heel etiquette when your man's a shorty

dear caprilee...what's the current rule on heel height when you're dating a shorter man...?...can i go taller than him?....or is that in bad taste and just plain rude?

linda

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Hi Linda,

Thanks for your question. I personally have yet to date a man shorter than my 5 foot 2 inch stature, (except for Eric Farley who I totally towered over in Pre K) but I can see the potential quandary for those women who aren't as vertically challenged as yours truly.

Most celebrity actresses/models don't mind if they've got a foot or two on their male escorts because they love the spotlight and crave being the centers of attention. Case in point - Katie Holmes.

Tom Cruise might have achieved success getting his statuesque sweetheart to say goodbye to Jesus in the name of Scientology, but he hasn't gotten her to say goodbye to those sky high heels. Every time she makes the red carpet rounds she towers over Tom, even though the height difference is only 2 inches (she's 5'9, he's 5'7). It won't be long before Suri exchanges her baby booties for 4 inch high leather booties, and finds herself looking down on dear old Dad along with Katie.

I usually opt for the highest heels available to avoid standing on my tip tip tippy toes whenever I want to kiss my tall, dark and handsome significant other. If the roles were reversed, would I ditch my strappy heeled sandals? I don't know. I'm stumped...literally.

Here's the long and short of it Linda - I'm usually known to shun rules. I don't believe in them. Wanna wear white after Labor Day? I don't care, just work it and own it with confidence and I'm a happy camper. If you love wearing high heels but are worried about Dopey, Sleepy, Sneezy, Grumpy, Bashful, Happy or Doc's ego getting bruised...ask your guy straight up if he minds being seen about town with a Glamazon. If he has a problem with it, there are plenty of stylish flats in the sea. BUT- Don't get rid of your collection of stilettos just yet. You might break up with shorty and your next beau might be of epic sized proportions.

Hope this helps.

*Caprilee

p.s. If you're a tall drink of water looking for some clothes to coordinate with those killer shoes, Long Elegant Legs has a rather statuesque selection.

Having a fashion dilemma or crisis?

Need to know what top goes with what bottom?

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Hail Mary Jane - Mary Jane styles for big girls

Dear Caprilee,

Mel

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Dear Mel,

Traditionally Mary Janes are considered low heeled, broad and rounded closed toed shoes featuring a single-buckle strap across the instep and/or around the ankle, and yes...they are mainly associated with little girls, ruffles and petticoats.

Black patent leather Mary Janes were all the rage when I was in Pre-School, a trend I never had the chance to fully enjoy since I was born pigeon toed and sentenced to a childhood wearing clunky orthopedic shoes that made me feel like I worked on a chain gang.

I have a lot of years to make up for, so thank the Shoe Gods that there's a wide variety of designer Mary Jane pumps out there inspired by little girls, but made for big girl feet. Try on these No Barre Pumps or a pair of Eventa Patent Mary-Janes from the master of luxury footwear Christian Louboutin.

They're girlishly sexy with skyscraper height, totally unShirleyTemple-like, and so much lighter than those Iron Man clunkers of my childhood. Did I mention Manolo Blahnik makes a camouflage Mary Jane?

Just call me G.I. Mary Jane.

Having a fashion dilemma or crisis?

Need to know what top goes with what bottom?

Don't go it alone. Ask Caprilee!

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Ask Caprilee - Thanksgiving Edition

Hi Caprilee,

Thanx,
Maggie

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Hi Mags!

Thanks for your question. I'm sure there are plenty of ladies out there in cyberland pondering over what they should wear for the big holiday dinner with the in-laws, new beau's fam, second cousins thrice removed, etc.

I say - First, do some investigative research. Ask your boyfriend how his family usually dresses during the holidays. If they eat turkey on paper plates in shorts and t-shirts around the flat screen, then it's obviously a pretty casual affair- but don't let that be an invitation to wear sweats and a sports bra. You're a special guest this year, so they might just up the ante and dress a little more traditionally in your honor. Odds are it won't be a black tie affair since there will be home cooking and gravy involved, so I would put casually elegant at the top of the menu.

If you wear jeans make sure they're dark, boot cut and not too low slung (you don't want to give Grandpa an eyeful of coin slot if you bend over to pick up a napkin). Pair it with a nice blouse that's a step up from your everyday tee.

If you're more of a dress girl, leave the taffeta and lace at home and choose something that doesn't attract a Iot of attention. You don't want to outdo the audacious Aunt Mae. Keep the majority of your yams covered with a skirt that falls slightly above or at the knee and a bodice that leaves your bosom properly concealed, and don't forget your bra...you don't need your guy's fam to notice when your turkeys are done.

I myself will probably go the safe route with something along the lines of this sweeter-than-a-sweet-potato Sweater Dress from dELiA*s.

Dear Lord,

Amen,
Caprilee

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Puff 'em if you got 'em.

Are puffy vests still in Caprilee? I'm looking for winter jackets and don't want to bother if they're out.

-Maddie

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Dear Maddie,

Look at you brushing up on the season's trends before you shell out some of your hard earned ducats on a new winter wardrobe. I say Bravo. We should all follow Maddie's lead and put in a little effort when it comes to purchasing seasonal clothing. Depending on where you live, you might only get to wear your new piece for a few months before the last snowball is thrown, so you'd better make it count.

It's better to invest in timeless pieces you'll look forward to wearing for a few more years, and you can always change it up from year to year with trendy accessories that are a sign of the times with price tags that are easier on your wallet. Back to your question...

Are puffy vests still in? Yes.

Puffy pirate shirts? Not so much.

Check out this Gap Puffer Vest in cool seasonal colors like squash, earth brown, off-white, true black and my favorite, the perfect shade of blue gray. Layer it over a cowlneck sweater and you've got the warmth without all the bulk of a full puffy jacket.

By the by Maddie, if you're in love with a trend and no one else is at that particular moment in time my motto is - "To thine own fashion self be true". Go for it anyway, unless you're really in love with pasties and coulottes...then I'd do some rethinking.

xoxo,
Caprilee

Having a fashion dilemma or crisis?

Need to know what top goes with what bottom?

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Mommy needs a new pair of shoes

I am almost seven months pregnant and am increasingly clumsy and off balance, due to my ever expanding baby-belly. It has gotten to the point that I can no longer wear high heels. I need something flat and comfortable but cute. I don’t want to look like I am wearing grandma shoes. Help!

Signed,
Too-young-for-bingo

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Dear Too-young-for-bingo,

Mommy's got a bun in the oven!

1. Congratulations!

2. You've come to the right place.

I've already given my readers an alternative to the Mom jean...now let's work our way down.

I'm betting that besides the hormonal changes, back/leg aches and fatigue you're experiencing the pregnant woman's hell...swollen feet.

You're right on the money- you need flats. By month seven, you don't have the time or the balance to be tottering around in heels that are anything over 2 inches. They'll only add to your pain and make you want to smack your baby daddy for getting you in this position in the first place.

Look for flats that come in wider sizes (swelling may make your regular size and width totally unbearable), and Slip-ons are a must. What pregnant woman wants to bend over to tie her shoe laces? Another feature baby mamas need? Decent arch support. If you can't find a pair you're crazy about that feature good arch support, no sweat- add an easy-does-it insert that'll get the job done for you.

Say goodbye to the 5 inch Steve Madden's you used to wear to the clubs, and give your feet a break by slipping on a pair of these Hush Puppies Break flats. Indulge in sleek, comfortable fashion with the these adorable low-cut skimmers that feature leather lining, a latex footbed, and trim EVA wedge midsoles that provide cushioning and breathability, while the two-color molded rubber sole adds grip and stability for those days when you're totally off balance.

Cute with jeans or your flirtiest maternity sundresses, and they're on sale, so Mommy gets her new pair of shoes while baby gets a new pack of Pampers.

Best wishes for an easy delivery!

xoxo,
Caprilee

Having a fashion dilemma or crisis?

Need to know what top goes with what bottom?

Don't go it alone. Ask Caprilee!

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Mini me.

Dear Caprilee,

Thanks,
Kris
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Hi Kris,

There's no doubt about it. Fall's here, winter's a comin'.

Who says you have to ditch that cute denim mini?! Certainly not I.

Pull a Tim Gunn and make it work with a pair of cute Opaque tights and your gams will be properly concealed and safe from the elements. Take it from an expert Kris, these tights are tight.

If you're like me, you'll want to pick up a bunch, one in every color in case you get runs (I bet all of my male readers are giggling right now because I brought up getting the runs...not those runs boys). Go crazy with a different hue for every day of the week. Alloy will hook you up with burgundy, dark brown, rust, gold, gray, blue, purple and black and one size fits all, so they adapt to your shape effortlessly.

...add a pair of sexy knee high boots and you have my total seal of approval. You'll get brownie points if you top it off with a raspberry beret.

xoxo,
Caprilee

Having a fashion dilemma or crisis?

Need to know what top goes with what bottom?

Don't go it alone. Ask Caprilee!

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Make it work.

dear caprilee,

i just arrived at work and realize i hate what i'm wearing!!*! i don't think i can last 8 hours of this. what can i do?

becca

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Hi ya Becca,

Hmmm, you didn't leave me many details, so I'm not sure what I'm dealing with here. Your outfit may not be that bad, or...you may be wearing a tutu. Who knows? You also didn't mention where you work. If you work on a construction site, a bright yellow hard hat works out just fine...if you're a perfume spritzer at Saks, not so much.

Since I don't have any specifics, I can only offer you a few blind suggestions on how to get through the day:

1. Don't get up from your desk all day unless you have to. Cover your top with file folders.
2. Find a co-worker your size who's wearing a cuter outfit than yours and give her twenty bucks to swap clothes with you.
3. Tell your boss you have cramps and go home.
4. Go shopping for a new outfit at lunch.
5. Hang out in the bathroom with a few fashion mags. When asked where you've been, tell them you had Taco Bell for lunch.

And...to avoid being a fugly Becca in the future...

1. Reserve a section of your closet with easy, no fail pieces. Think classic trousers, pencil skirts, solid tanks and form fitting button downs that you can mix and match and not mess up.
2. Lay out your work outfit the night before (make sure you're not intoxicated when you do it).
3. Keep a crisp fitting blazer in your car or at work. If all else fails, at least you can cover up your top half.
4. Ask your most stylish girlfriend to help you shop for a whole new work wardrobe.
5. Quit your job and work from home.

Work it.

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Out of Office Reply.

Dear Caprilee,

Patricia

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Dear Patricia,

Didn't you get the memo?

Tape.

Scotch tape. Your office is bound to have a roll stashed away somewhere. Rip off a strip, apply to the hairier parts of your sweater and rip off. Apply. Rip. Repeat...until hairless. It's much like waxing, but far less painful.

This is a handy trick I picked up on my own one day when I spent a little too much time cuddling my pup before work, and it's proven just as valuable as using a matchbook to file my nails in a pinch. Besides, what do you think women did back in the 50's before they even invented lint rollers?

Just try to be a little inconspicuous. I wouldn't recommend faux waxing your chest in the middle of a board meeting.

That would be tape tacky.

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All Scratched up with no place to go.

Dear Caprilee,

I loved your blog on vintage sunglasses, but whenever i splurge on a new pair, I always end up scratching them in my purse. What's a stylish way to keep my sunglasses in top condition?

XOXO,
Scratchy

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Dear Scratchy Sue,

Guess what? I too have found myself a victim of bad scratching, and I don't mean sucky deejays or blind dates with itches down under.

I'm on the case, with a hip selection of sunglass cases that are cushy and cottony and will protect your priceless specs from any more nasty scratchy scratchies. Find the style that suits you from animal themes to seventies floral and say goodbye to blemished lenses. Better news? They're all $5.80 at ForLove21.

Don't scratch 'em if you've got 'em.

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Men in Pink

Hey Caprilee,

-Jacob

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Dear Jacob,

Ahh...the age old male fashion dilemma- To pink, or not to pink...that is the question. Some men are into low rise jeans that show off their boxers...some men feel naked without a tie around their neck...some men prefer pastel colored shirts. There's no need to be perplexed by pink because contrary to popular belief, I say 1. Real men do eat quiche, and 2. Real men do wear pink. So go nuts (with almonds)!

Whether you're debating over a tailored Dress shirt, a Classic Pique Lacoste polo, or some classic Pink kicks, I'll give you the same advice I give the ladies. If pink compliments your coloring, wear it. If it washes you out and makes you look like you have mono, skip it. But don't shy away from pink because you feel it might make you less manly. If anything, a dude wearing pink exudes confidence.

And by the by, if wearing a pink shirt like the one shown above did in fact make you look gay, what's wrong with that? All of the gay men I know dress better than straight men anyway.

*Just avoid shopping Victoria's Secret Pink Collection. That would be beyond gay.

Posted by Samara at 08:49 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Hair's to you...

Dear Capri Lee,

I would like to change my look and don't know where to start. I would like to be a little more glamorous, but I don't like to wear dresses and have just started learning how to walk in heels. How can I update my style fast without buying an entire new wardrobe?

-Meghan

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Dear Meghan,

I know the feeling. You wake up one day, look in the mirror and decide, "I want a whole new me". To some girls, that means getting a lower back tattoo. To others it means injecting ungodly amounts of botox into their faces. And yet to others it means buying tons of trendy outfits that are so not them and end up being donated to Goodwill by the end of the season.

My cure for the I wanna be me-but-better-blues? I get a haircut. Hair is one of the best accessories we girls have, and the right locks can be just as effective as a Chanel handbag.

I had my hair cut this weekend (actually, i had them all cut) and immediately felt more polished and ready to take on the world. Be bold and let your stylist perform some shear genius that will take you from cute to va-va-va-voomlicious. If you have long hair, try a shorter shoulder length do or a bob to update your look...if you have short hair, see how the other half lives and go glamorous with some long, luxurious extensions. Long hair can make an even bigger feminine statement than the girliest of sundresses. Just look at the instant transformation on Lauren Conrad of The Hills.

*Warning: Extensions can be way expensive when you have them done in a salon. The upkeep is murder, plus they can hurt like a mother. A great alternative? Sweet, Rapunzel like do it yourself hair extensions you can clip in yourself. No pain, on your scalp or your wallet. Plus, if you get sick of them, just unclip and go.

You can't do that when your stylist accidentally gives you a mullet.

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Turn the other cheeky.

Caprilee,

Cheeky
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Hola Cheeky!

I don't wear thongs very often either, especially after that freak thong incident with that LA cop last month. My recommendation? Get yourself some hanky panky.

Hold on there Cheeky Monkey, I am by no means suggesting a shag with your fella, this isn't that kind of blog, I am suggesting the brand Hanky Panky- lacy underthings that are in my opinion, the holy grail of panties. No lie, these hanky pankies are in a word - swanky.

How do I love thee Hanky Panky? Let me count the ways...

1. I love that you're a one size fits all panty which means you meld to my shape - no saggy bottom Capri here.
2. I love that you come in an adorable variety of assorted colors and prints - over 30 if you please.
3. I love that I have no wedgies on Hanky Panky's watch.
4. I love that you come in low rise styles so I don't flash everyone when I do the limbo.
5. I love that you come in both thong and no thong varieties.
6. I love that you don't come apart in the washing machine.
7. I love your boy shorts almost as much as I love boys in general.
8. I love that you make me wanna have some hanky panky.

But don't take my word for it. Hanky Panky's are good enough to cover up Cameron Diaz's, Cindy Crawford's, Jessica Simpson's and Kate Hudson's cheeks, so they should be good enough to cover yours.

De Nada.

*Footnote for my boy readers- VPL - An acronymn for Visible Panty Line: the unfortunate event where the panties of a woman are visible through the material of her lower-body clothing. This is a definite fashion faux pas and damages the overall aesthetic beauty of an otherwise lovely posterior.

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Life's a beach.

Dear Caprilee,

Nell

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Whoa Nelly,

First- you must chill. Let me make this more than easy for you with a look that will surely take you from sand to surf and turf with no effort whatsoever. Plus, these three magic items will take up less space in your beach bag than your Time Flies When You're Having Rum beach towel.

Light breathable sundress + small classy clutch + faux snakeskin sandals = hot beach chick.

Now have a good time and relax. If you act this desperate on your date, he just won't be that into you.

Posted by Samara at 08:30 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Bathing Suit up

Dear Caprilee,

Sagging bikini bottom girl.

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Dear Saggy,

Never fear, Caprilee is here.

Hit American Apparel for bikini separates!

They come wrapped up individually in these cute little plastic baggies in different sizes and colors, so you can mix and match and find the perfect fit for your tatas as well as your cheeky cheeks. They also have pretty funky pieces that are very Saturday Night Fever circa 1977.

If you're sticking with separates, Carabella is also rocking some perfect mix and match swimwear.

As for me, I'll be in the hot child in the monokini sipping mojitos on the beach.

Caprilee

***Any fashion questions? Fire away! Just leave them in a comment and Caprilee promises to get to them...
(although she may be fashionably late).

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Bursting your bubble.

Hey Capri,

U rock,
Trendy Wendy


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Here's the deal Trendy,

In theory, Bubble skirts are cute. In actuality, they look kinda weird if you're over the age of seven *unless* you still have the svelte figure of a seven year old. I have yet to meet a hippy girl (hippy, not hippie) who feels comfortable in a skirt that adds bulk to their problem areas...but unbootylicious girls usually look great in bubblicious skirts.

With that said, if you want to highlight your so called ba-donka-donk, who am I to stand in your way?

As for me, the only bubbles I'll be partaking in are from my pack of grape berry Hubba Bubba bubble gum...and I might add Bubble Boy to my Netflix...since Jake is in it.

Thanks for the kudos. I like to rock. I also like to rock, paper, scissors...

...and if you wanna stay Trendy, Wendy...get a Fendi.

*Caprilee

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Cheap kicks

Dear Caprilee,

-Jackie

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No Jackie,

It's not tacky shopping at Payless. What's tacky is spelling tacky with an ie.

Not to sound like I'm on the Payless payroll, but seriously- why pay more? It's perfectly acceptable to buy shoes from Payless. I'm giddy for these Liddy Canvas Wedges by American Eagle. They come in a lovely summer shade of canary yellow for only $19.99, and if you can't afford that, what can I tell you. You might have to hit Goodwill and invest in some previously owned shoes that someone's Great Aunt Ida wore in the swingin' 60's. That, or something in the form of an Old Navy flip flop.

Happy shoe shopping Jackie...and while school is out, crack open a spelling book or two. A mind is a terrible thing to waste.

*Caprilee

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Little woman walking.

Dear Caprilee,

Signed,
5'1 and done growing

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Dear 5'1 and done growing,

First, thanks for being my very first fashion advice guinea pig. I printed out your question with pride and have put it up on my corkboard next to the first dollar I ever earned scooping ice cream at Häagen Dazs. I digress...capris. I love capris, in fact my Mom did too. It ain't no coincidence my name is Capri-lee after all.

Don't listen to the masses, go ahead and wear 'em. Like my man Nelly says "It's getting hot in herre", so instead of taking off all your clothes, take off all the long pants. Short pants are essential for summer, no matter how much of a shorty you are. Carrie Bradshaw was tiny, and wearing capris never stopped her from having all that sex in the city (which opens tonight by the way- I know, shameless plug). My advice, stick to capris that hit right at the knee...and wedges will always make you look taller.

Hope this helps....and in the meantime, some Flintstone vitamins might help you out an inch or two...they have ten million strong and growing.

At your service,

Caprilee

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CapriWho?

Who can turn the world on with her smile?
Who can take a nothing day, and suddenly make it all seem worthwhile?

Caprilee can!

A lot of my loyal blog readers have asked me time and time again: "Sammy, who is this Caprilee, and what should I ask her?"

My answer- Caprilee is everything you want her to be. She's your best friend. You're loyal neighbor. She's Mrs. Roper from Three's Company. Your Mom when she's not asking if you're wearing clean underwear. You're favorite celebrity. The celebrity you love to make fun of. All three Charlie's Angels. Then and now. In short, there is a little bit of Caprilee in all of us my dear subscribers. Ask what you will, she will answer.

Want to know if spanx are still in? Ask Caprilee.

Want to know what to wear on your first date with that hottie Director of Packaging? Ask Caprilee.

Want to know if shoulder pads are back or whack? Ask Caprilee.

So do a twirly whirly, throw your hat in the air, and fire away. Caprilee is making the world a better place...one fashion question at a time.

*We're gonna make it after all.

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